The office quotes (part 2).

A.K.A. The best argument ever for not working in an engineering department.
Also see the Who does what table at the end.
2003-March 2004 April-May 2004 June-July 2004 Aug-Oct 2004 Nov 2004-Jan 2005 Feb 2005-Jun 2005 Quotes Index Front page

"Accuracy is a function of price."
Office motto.
Alice: "My IO [chip] is very much like that little girl with the curl in the middle of her forehead..."
Andrew: "How's that?"
Alice: "Because when it's good, it is very very good, but when it's bad, it is horrid".
(April 2004)
"That's the kind of thing that makes people like me think that there's something else going on that you can't see."
Hugh, April, 2004.
Alan: "Just ignore me. I think I'm going insane."
Alice: "Can I quote you on that?"
Alan: "Yes."
(April 8th, 2004)
"Oh, my [drinking] glasses always have radial symmetry."
(Andrew, April 2004 )
Alice: "When you argue with Henry, it is very difficult, because he makes these 6-dimensional perpendicular arguments that you just can't do anything with and it's like...arrgh..."
Henry: "What can I say, it's a skill."
Hugh: "Hmm. Could you make a living off of that?"
Henry: "I don't know, how much is annoying Alice worth to you?"
Ferris: "Priceless".
(April 8th, 2004. Lunchtime conversation)
"I really want to go on this fruit-tasting tour of Australia."
(Hugh, April 9th 2004)
"Yeah, our company coffee really makes you appreciate other kinds of coffee..."
(overheard, break room, April 2004)
Hugh: "You see, you hang out with all these insane people..."
Ferris: "Yeah, but not insane because of you..."
(April 9th 2004, lunchtime conversation, to a third party)
"Somebody should invent cereal that you don't need milk for, you know, with the milk inside already built in. So you chew on them and then the milk squirts out, you know?"
(Albert, April 28th, 2004, lunchtime conversation).
"It's not trash. If it has a use, it's junk."
(Hugh, April 28th, 2004.)
Frank: "Yeah, leaves are your friend...In fact, some of my best friends have been leaves..."
Matt: "Some of my best friends know when to leave."
(May 6th, 2004. Lunchtime conversation).
Bill: "Let's talk about deliverables. Did you get your power supply?"
Frank: "No, but Mark showed me a picture of one today."
(May 10th, 2004)
"Hey Henry, what do you call a decimal point in binary mode? Would you call it a binary point?"
(Andrew, May 11th, 2004)
Alice: "It has to be perfect, but it doesn't have to be that perfect."
Henry: "So you're not a perfectionist, you're a good-enoughist?"
(May 13, 2004).
"When you type as badly as I do, every letter counts."
(Alan, May 17th, 2004).
Andrew: "Hmm...I want one of those brownies, but then my tea is not going to taste sweet anymore..."
Alice: "So add some sugar to your tea."
Andrew: "I already have a lot of sugar in my tea."
Alice: "So eat the brownies and then drink water and then drink your tea."
Paul: "Hi guys!"
Alice: "We're discussing the finer points of how to eat brownies with your tea."
Paul: "Oh yeah?"
Andrew: "Yeah, my tea tastes funny if I eat a brownie first."
Paul: < Very long pause > "Oh! Wait! I just missed the point that there were brownies here!!"
(May 18th, break room)
Henry: "Are you [rock] climbing?"
Adam: "No, I'm just standing here."
(May 21, 2004)
Alice: "In Italy, at the beach, they have these kiosks where you can go and get yourself a personal mini-pizza and you can eat it while you're there at the beach and it's so delicious 'n' stuff."
Frank: "Oh, I have one of those in my refrigerator."
Alice: "What, a beach?"
(May, 2004, lunchtime conversation)
Henry: "Why do I have the sudden urge to hit her [Alice] with a large halibut?"
Matt: "Because a small one wouldn't do enough damage?"
(May 27, 2004 lunchtime conversation).
"So you're saying mold and morons are a form of entropy."
(Henry, paraphrasing Matt, May 27, 2004)
"We were discussing brain function and whether any of us have any..."
(Alan, Cafeteria, May 2004).
Who does what:
AlgorithumsAl, Alan, Albert, Andrew, Angus, Adam, Alice
Firmware Eng. Frank, Ferris
Hardware Eng. Hugh, Harry, Henry, Holden
Managment Bill, Ben, Bob
Mechanical Eng. Matt, Mark
Operations Oliver
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